Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and don't
lean on your own understanding. In all things acknowledge him, and he shall direct
your way. ~Proverbs 3:5, 6.
Holidays are always a tough time for single parents. The child(ren) are shuffled from here to there and God forbid it is written in your divorce decree that you have to rotate every other year (which is my case).
Christmas was always my favorite holiday and this
year....I barley made it through because my ex decided that it was best for him
to move to SC last year after Christmas. This meant this year 4 days before
Christmas my daughter was on a plane to SC. One second she was hear and the next
she was gone. I was stuck…confused…and sad.
The problem is that in his mind he doesn’t see her
and he feels no guilt, no remorse for taking her from her mother on Christmas
no matter how much it means to me. This is the ugly side of divorce in its truest
and rarest form. It is the thing that hurts
the most about being divorced whether mother or father…spending time
away from your child(ren) when the law has taken away that right to be there.
Mothers don’t want to see their children suffer and
a good mother will always do what is best for them, no matter the pain it will
cause them. We will sacrifice heart and soul to make sure that our child(ren)
are okay and don’t know the true pain and reach of the reach world. We will protect
at every turn. We will suck up the things that we want for the sake of our
child(ren).
So this is the first Christmas day since I could
remember feeling hurt and pain. Yes, I understand the real meaning of Christmas
but that unfortunately this year it doesn’t take away the pain that only a mother
can understand. But I can stake some comfort that without the Birth of Jesus
there would be no Christmas and that all things consider my daughter is happy
spending time with her father.
I know that God is carrying me through this moment
and that is what I seek refuge in.
“Weeping may endure for a night but joy does come
in the morning” ~Psalm 30:5